Thursday, June 30, 2005


Today is the annual summer "picnic" and cookout at the soon-to-be old job. In my office on the 6th floor I can smell the meat cooking on the grill out back AND IT MAKES ME HUNGRY. As distraction, I will now ponder and submit my entry for Countdown Day Vier:

4 People I Want to Spend More Time With:
(this is *way* too few to be going on with. I need more like 40)

1. ALL of my girls -- I refuse anything less than everyone.
2. Mom
3. Kathy & family
4. Ryan

Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Welcome to the Sauna!

God, there's little that could be added to make it more uncomfortable in D.C. right now. Muggy, muggy, muggy and many impending storms but no relief as yet. In that spirit of "Isn't it supposed to be June?" I bring you Countdown Day Tano:

5 Things I Do Every Day:

1. wish I could sleep in longer
2. drink coffee
3. email Kristin; talk to Ryan
4. read Dooce
5. wish I was on vacation with friends and family

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Mmmmm...celebrate ME!!

I've just come from my good-bye lunch here at the soon-to-be old job. I requested picnic food and so we catered sandwiches in from D.C. Hott and they? Was delicious. Various fabulous co-workers supplied side salads, soda and iced tea, and *yummy* desserts including buckeyes, lemon cake and pecan tartlettes. Yes, it was a bit of a fancy picnic, but the general ethos was there. Don't quibble with me. Everyone was lovely and kind and wished me well, and hooked me up with a sweet gift certificate so that I can go buy more Straight-Laced work clothes (as the sundresses and flip flops that I sport here will be VERBOTEN at the New Job). We spent the better part of the lunch reminiscing over good old-school candy (Fun Dip, Big League Chew, Sugar Daddies, Ring Pops, and Nerds topped my personal list) and Steve uttered the immortal phrase "I think Splenda will save my life."

Good times. I will surely miss this crew.

Playing catch-up, here's Day Sei:

6 Things I Say Most Days:

1. Right?!
3. WTF mate?
4. F that S.
5. Can we do it earlier? I have rowing tomorrow.
6. I'll cut you.

Ed. After hanging out with Erin and Kathryn last night I realized that there are a few things I say that somehow I forgot but that must be included on this list. Hence, see new edited version above.

Monday, June 27, 2005

I'm using the wonders of technology to post-date this back to yesterday even though I did not, in fact, write anything. Reason being, I was feeling a bit poorly. Poorly as in I fainted on the metro. For rill, not for fake fainted in the middle of a packed train car. Luckily I was surrounded by several lovely people who helped me up, gave me a seat and some water, and saw that I got to my stop without further incident. I blame the heat, two weekend nights of not going to bed until after 2, getting up at 4 to drive home, and Tara's Block Party margaritas. I'm feeling a bit more up to snuff today though, and wanted to get back to the business of the countdown, so here she be, Day Sieben:

7 Things That Annoy Me:

1. people who drive with NO THOUGHT to others on the road. You are not alone out there, peoples.
2. picking the wrong line -- grocery store, toll booth, you name it. I always choose poorly and it bugs the shit out of me.
3. when people stand on the left on metro escalators. I don't care if you aren't from around here. MOVE IT.
4. smugness
5. traffic on I-95
6. that I look forward to the weekend for SO LONG and then *pouf*, it's over.
7. living so far away from most of my favorite people

Friday, June 24, 2005

Sophie Virginia Whitehead-Thomas

Congratulations to Cheryl and Jeannette on the birth of their super-sweet little girl.

Countdown, Day Ocho

8 Things I Like to Wear:

1. shoes that make me taller
2. blue linen & white flowered sundresses (H&M, see you now!)
3. jeans and sweaters in the fall
4. a huge picture hat, a la royal weddings (I *would* like to but haven't yet)
5. boxers & tank top pajamas from Target. Any pajamas, really.
6. Issey Miyake perfume
7. fleece
8. nothing

Thursday, June 23, 2005

I'm not making light of this case, but can't stop myself from pointing out the dude's last name:

Paul Van Der Sloot is being viewed as a suspect in the case of Natalee Holloway. Holloway, 18, from Birmingham, Alabama, went missing on the island on May 30 at the end of a graduation vacation.

Heh. They said "slOOt". Now to see if there's an O'Sloot or a McSloot, or....

For all you Freaks and Geeks fans out there:

Paul Feig, one of the creators and writers of that most excellent though short-lived show has a new book coming out, and accompanying book tour. Here's the deets from the Friends of F&G email:

Hey gang,

Just wanted to let you all know that my new book, Superstud: Or How I Became a 24 Year Old Virgin, is coming out in stores on June 28th. It"s the follow-up to my last book, Kick Me: Adventures in Adolescence, but it's about ten times more embarrassing, I have to say. But just wanted to let you know about it and, more importantly, that I'm going to be heading out on a book tour in July and wanted to let you all know where I'll be appearing so that if you're nearby, you can stop in and say hi. (You don't even have to buy a book! Just say hey.)

7/8/2005 - Olsson's Books & Records
2111 Wilson Blvd. Arlington, VA 22201
703-525-4227 7 pm

In case you're interested. AND YOU SHOULD BE.

Countdown, Day Neuf

9 Things I Look Forward To:

1. Freshly-brewed coffee. Every day.
2. Having my hair washed at the salon before my haircut.
3. Thanksgiving.
4. Going to Australia.
5. Raising my kids.
6. My birthday.
7. Daily emails from Kristin, IMs from Erin, and calls from Ryan.
8. Autumn.
9. Owning my own home.

Seen in the boathouse today: a shirt that said


That? Raaawkhs. K, you wanna make me one at Strange Cargo? ;)

I don't usually bother with celebrity birthdays, but she rocks so much that I just have to do a wee shout out to Frances McDormand, who turns 48 today. Go ON with your bad self, McD.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Why eat the healthy cup of non-fat, low-sugar peach yogurt that I brought when I can eat TWO KRISPY KREME DONUTS INSTEAD?

Why, indeed.

It's the final countdown

With a mere 10 days left at my current job, I figured I'd do something fun to mark each day. Just a little something to spur at least one post a day. I know--you're beside yourselves with joy.

Today's bit:

10 songs I've been listening to a lot lately (in no particular order):

1. "Mr. Brightside" remix The Killers
2. "Beginner's Mind" Old School Freight Train
3. "Not Just Me" Rascal Flatts
4. "The Obvious Child" from Concert in the Park -- LOVE the drums Paul Simon
5. "Young Pilgrims" The Shins
6. "Pancho and Lefty" Willie Nelson (but only b/c I don't have Townes Van Zandt's version)
7. "Cowboy Take Me Away" Dixie Chicks
8. "Naked As We Came" Iron & Wine
9. "Kid Charlemagne" Steely Dan
10. "Galvanize" Chemical Brothers

Six degrees of linking

Courtesy of Velvet Rope via XO London, this hilarious post and wee video "When Tom Attacks." You will not regret checking it out--open guffawing at the desk will ensue.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Happy Anniversary to Christie and Stefan. Their big day was 2 years ago in Maine, on what still ranks up there as one of the best weekends I've ever had. The traditional gift for this milestone is cotton--be on the lookout for your lifetime supply of Q-tips, you crazy kids. ;)Lervies!!

Afloat Lab

I rowed by this this morning, moored at the Navy Research Laboratory.

Monday, June 20, 2005

Another excellent but busy weekend. We spent Saturday in Harrisonburg with Ryan's family, taking advantage of some excellent old-school diversions like horseshoes and croquet. Cutie George of the PBR loves a good game of croquet and busted out the wickets and mallets and I got roundly, decisively SPANKED by everyone. Ryan and I played partners, and even with him coming back and helping me as much as he could I still finished dead-last and embarrassed the collective pride of the Doss lawn-game-ept contingent. In my defense I haven't played in about 10 years--not since my last whirl through Delta Phi croquet in support of some philanthropy or other, wearing a picture hat and dallying around the Sunken Gardens. As I recall, I didn't do half-badly that day, but then my memory is a vague and changling thing these days. I then went on to lose a pool game and to spazz out regularly trying to play ping pong. I never was the greatest with games of hand/eye coordination but somehow now I flail more and more spectacularly with each passing year. It's fetching, and a great gene to pass on to children, lemmetellya. I will be the primary reason that my kids get picked last for everything except football.

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Happy Birthday, Corinna!!!

CFFish is also rocking the Gemini birthday this week, and keeping it rill with her badass 29 year-old self. I have known this girl since the 9th grade and have always been so impressed and charmed by her. I just wish she didn't live so far away. *sigh*

Friday, June 17, 2005

"This week's announcement on MTV News that Destiny's Child plans to disband after finishing its world tour in the fall portends a sad goodbye to Bedazzled fashion."

Hilarious article in today's Post about the demise of Destiny's Child. Anything that comments thusly *has*to be good, no?

Have no fear, the Bedazzler will always have a fan in Kristin.

Every once in a while Yahoo! radio runs an ad for Yahoo! personals and the latest batch totally crack me up. They're a play on the whole Subliminal Man thing Kevin Nealon did on SNL. A typical convo runs this way:

Man: Hey! It's great to finally (Nice legs!) meet you.
Woman: I know, we've been (Marriage, marriage!) emailing for so long.
Man: I'm excited (sex) to see this (sex) new movie (sex).
Woman: Me too; It's (wedding date) gotten great (7 bridesmaids) reviews.
Man: So, did I tell you I'm studying (spending the night) to be a (fun fling) scuba instructor?
Woman: No! That's (2-carat diamond ring) interesting.

They get me every time. I am, admittedly, easily entertained that way though.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Erin, Courtney and I started out wanting to see Cinderella Man last night, but the timing worked out better for us to see Batman Begins and holy shit that is a good movie. And you didn't hear it from me, but Christian Bale is H.O.T.T. Shoulders/stompers and I'll say no more.

Such a good flick, for srrrs. No gimmicks, true to the comic book without being cartoon-y, if you know what I mean. Excellent casting (except for Katie "Religious Crisis" Holmes CROOKED MOUTH) especially Michael Caine and Morgan Freeman. Liam Neeson was looking all kinds of gaunt (compared to Kinsey, for instance) but the pacing, plot, scenes, feeling: all aces. Get thee out and have a looksee. DO IT.

Happy Birthday, Grace!!!!!

Vroom Vroom is celebrating her 29th today. She is dope and fly and loves her clothes equally, like children. I dig her beaucoup long time.

--La Fille Blanche (Merde)

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

It's a bit like looking at strangers

This is a picture of the Ring Dance at the U.S. Naval Academy in the spring of 1957. My mother and father are seated at table 99, on the left side of the table. He's 2nd in from the corner, and she's just behind him. Tell me she doesn't look EXACTLY like Shelby in the picture below.

Not for nothing, but I'd kill for one of those dresses. They look so billowy and feminine. Not that I have anywhere to wear such a garment, but still...a girl can dream.

Living the weekend was so tiring that I only just now have enough energy to write about it. I don't mean bad-tiring--quite the opposite--but so packed and busy that I'll spend all week recovering.

Friday I took a half-day off and headed for Richmond to be on hand for Ryan's company picnic. He works in a fairly new office, populated by people our age, give-or-take 7 years. Almost everyone is married and almost everyone has kids. Seriously, there were at least 15 kids under the age of 5 there and it was hilarious. My favorites were the twin girls latched into their car seat/carriers, jolly and fat like floured scones who giggled at the slightest provocation. We spent our time being squirted with water pistols, swinging on the swings, and surreptitiously enjoying frosty Yeungling in cleverly disguised glasses so as to hide the drinking from the wee'uns. Because we didn't want to share.

Saturday we took advantage of the first full weekend in Richmond since the move to finish unpacking and cleaning the hell out of the house. Banshee tumbleweeds were rounded up, patio furniture purchased, the hammock hung, laundry done, and much buying of groceries, marinating of meat and chopping of vegetables in preparation for Operation Family on Sunday. We squeezed in a cookout with Tara, Will, Chris, and Wendi that night, but were D.O.N.E. by midnight.

Sunday afternoon we hosted most of Ryan's immediate family and cooked up a RIGHTEOUS fajita spread in honor of the occasion. For much of the afternoon I was content to sit quietly and listen to the family bat around old stories and jokes and just absorb the good vibes that come from getting a big clan together. Doss parties are the same way. I can declare unreservedly that George, Ryan's 80+ year-old grandfather is the sweetest thing EVER and had me at hello with stories of falling out of a hammock while high on moonshine, and passing the time in his younger days watching cows amble down a country road. Not to mention that he brings his own PBR everywhere. That is a high-quality individual in my book.

When everyone cleared out to head home we took to the couch and knocked out a few movies (one of which was the aforementioned horrible Meet the Fockers that should have been turned off 1/2 way through). I took a half-day on Monday as well so that I didn't have to sit in morning commuter traffic but that still wasn't enough to get me anything like rested or refreshed, and I was IN BED ASLEEP by 8:30 Monday night. It was *still light out*, people. Adam may still have it in him, but clearly I am not 28 any more. We had such a great time though; it was totally worth it.

The holy-moly-this-is-good salad I made for Sunday.

This isn't good-bye, just au revoir

I'm in frantic consultations with XO about planning my going-away bash(es) because I quit my job on Monday.

Re-read that if you need to. I'll give you a second.

As most of you know, I've had another job in the wings for a while now that has finally come to fruition and I'll be making the transition in the middle of next month. Hence, in the meantime I must see to all sorts of pressing details like taking home my wee coffee maker and all the emergency hair-suppression devices I have stashed in my desk; cleaning out the .jpegs and music that I saved onto my computer; and figuring out whether I want the going-away dinner to be at L'Auriol (for old-time's sake) or Penang (for DAMN that shit is good sake).

Three weeks from tomorrow I'm Audi 5000. That is SOON. And cool. And fucking scary. Woo!!

Got all the way into work this morning before discovering that I HAD MY SHIRT ON INSIDE-OUT. Way to go, Doss. Way. to. go.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

This is one of the many reasons that I LOVE my friends

I've been whiling away some time doing one of those "Things about me" questionnaires that was forwarded to me. One of my buddies filled it out in return, and answered the following:

10. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK? Crime and punishment

AHAHAHAHahahahahahhahahahahahaaaa. And I totally agree. ;-)

Monday, June 13, 2005

How to survive the sweaty-crotch-hot weather, according to

Stay indoors as much as possible
Wear lightweight, light-colored and loose-fitting clothing
Drink plenty of water regularly and often
Eat small meals, and eat more often
Avoid caffeinated beverages, carbonated drinks and alcohol

So, does this mean my all-black ninja robes and the gallon of coffee and Diet Dr. Pepper just consumed are all ill-advised? D'oh.

We may have a piper down here before too long.

Oh, and by the by, Meet the Fockers? SUCKED.

Friday, June 10, 2005

Excellent point

Reminds of a story I saw detailing the abduction of a California woman in her late 20s, 8 months pregnant, from a "normal" background (no shady connections or habits that might make kidnapping less of a "WTF?" moment) who disappeared without a trace. This happened just before the whole Laci Peterson business and there was not story one about it in the news at the time--supposition being that because she was African-American, the story was not as compelling or newsworthy. Pretty disgraceful.

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Are yearly "Best in Show" winner plates next?

In browsing the Virginia DMV specialized plate offerings, I found this here beauty. That is a hella-specific niche plate if ever there was one. It's in the "coming soon" portion, so the dude sponsoring it still has yet to drum up the 350 takers that will make this an official VA plate.

GO ON. You know you want to buy it.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Happy Birthday, Shelby!!!!

My eldest niece celebrates her 17th birthday today. She's my special Shuuuulbs and hands-down one of the coolest chicks on the planet. She gets that from her Auntie Anne.

The Birthday Girl...with her sassy new hair cut!!

Google's homage to Frank Lloyd Wright. Clev-ah!!

So the head of environmental services at my office just sent out an email apologizing for the fact that the A/C will only be working at 60% capacity today. Today being THE HOTTEST DAY OF THE YEAR.

Monday, June 06, 2005

We've been watching so many movies I may go to a grading system to let you in on my opinions, rather than full-blown descriptors for each one. Seriously, we are single-handedly keeping Netflix on its toes. This weekend:

1. The Notebook (A-)
2. In Good Company (B+)
3. Crash (B+)
4. The Aviator (B+)
5. American Graffiti (B)

1. As good as the book. Total chick flick. Bawled my eyes out. Love, love, love James Garner. Awww.

2. Good story, well done, some good funny moments. Dennis Quaid makes the movie and is aging VERY nicely. Scarlett Johannson is flat and listless and boring and has no chemistry with either Quaid or Grace.

3. Gut-wrenching. Very well-done, great cast (I heart Don Cheadle!) but superficial character descriptions and hard (but real) events make it a very depressing viewing experience. We didn't come out *quite* as shattered as after The House of Sand and Fog, but it comes closest of anything else we've seen.

4. MUCH better than I expected. I am not a big Leo fan, but he does an excellent job and the story is very compelling. I can totally see why Cate Blanchett won an Oscar for it. I totally have a girl crush on her--she ROCKS. Beckinsale, completely forgettable. Just goes to show that money will let "crazy" take on epic proportions (see Michael Jackson as further evidence).

5. I hadn't ever seen this all the way through--more like caught 20 minutes here and there on TBS over the years. It's basically Dazed and Confused in an earlier decade, and the cars are BOSS. Harrison Ford is a bit of a goob in it, and Mackenzie Phillips is annoying and homely as all holy fuck, but I loves me some young Richard Dreyfuss so that makes the movie right there. Good way to end the weekend.

I have lived in the South, with a small 20-month exception, all of my life. Yet each year, when summer rolls around in all its dog-day glory, I am still shocked and laid low by how awful the heat and humidity are. There's some storm front moving through the region today and tomorrow, pushing hot, wet air before it. Yesterday was so torpid that we barely moved, opting to lie around drinking shandys and mint juleps, and watching movies all day. Today is worse--hazy and just, well, gross.

Weather like this often reminds me of either summer camp or vacations because it seems like, growing up, this was the sort of weather I always had during either of those types of excursions. Various trips to Kansas, South Carolina, and New Jersey? Muggy. Band camp? Ditto. Day camp? Same. On days like these, in my head I am 11, bespectacled, rotund, sweaty, and eking my way through some gruesome exercise in puzzle-making, crafts, or family bonding.

When I have a family, if we aren't living somewhere with milder summer weather, then we are taking trips to cool mountain lakes, shady forests, and hikers beaches. And then when my kids get to days like these as adults, they will simply conjure memories of Mom saying "Everybody in the car. We? Are OUT OF HERE."

Friday, June 03, 2005

Ran-dom think-ing

1. I hate walking by canvassers on the street. They have my sympathy--it is a hard, thankless job--but I see them and I *dread* having to keep going wherever it is that I'm headed. It seriously feels like running a gauntlet and I FUCKING HATE IT.

2. Someone came to my blog today by doing a Google search for "penis pipes." What was that I was saying about "klassy"?

3. An office in the building next door must be having their company picnic because the air is full of the smoke and smell of barbecue. It is a siren song that calls to me. I about crashed straight up through the fence to join their party. Double klassy.

4. I need a nap.

In a hammock.

By a lake.

Alright now I'm just depressing myself.

Make new friends

I've spent the last 2 nights out with the wives of guys I went to high school with, sans the fellas. Kathryn made us an amazing shrimp dinner Wednesday night, followed by an evening stroll and coffee at Java Shack. Then last night Erin and I met up and hit 5 Guys for little bacon cheeseburgers and cajun fries, followed by the exercise in cheap shopping bliss that is Trader Joe's.

One of the best things about getting reacquainted with so many people from high school has been meeting their excellent spouses. The guys are great and all, but their lady-folk? Wicked rippin' cool.

Kristin, OF COURSE I thought of you

There's a big-screen TV downstairs in the lobby, that during the semester is most often tuned to the BBC World News service or CNN. But now, during summer break when it's really only the guard and various staff who watch what's on, the line-up has changed. I walked in this morning and heard, "...there's nothing wrong with living as a transvestite, is there?" (Audience: NOOooooo!) "Should we get Brawneesha out here?" (Audience: YESSssss!) *raucous applause*.

This moment? Brought to you by Maury. Ever with the klass.

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Memorial Day 2005...just some random shots y'all might enjoy.

A portion of Ryan's HUGE backyard. What cracks me up is how Thomas Kinkade it looks....he's Kristin and my favorite painter!!!

"You got like 3 feet of air that time!"

Thank can see my beer, and I didn't get in the way of the hot dogs. PHEW.

I didn't even call to her...she just turned around at precisely the right moment. Good girl!!

Most beautiful and bestest pooch. Hands down.

Two shots from the overwhelming tide of doggie that was our Saturday afternoon. Help yourself to the full album. I owe it all to the "action" setting on my camera. How else are you going to capture canine antics without a 400 shutterspeed?


Sweetie cutie wee Rooka