Friday, December 31, 2004

Happy New Year's Eve 2004

Here's hoping New Year's Eve and all of 2005 are

for you

(taken 12/27/04, I-95 North just south of Fredericksburg)

Thursday, December 30, 2004

XO does it again

Steve's latest discovery is John Legend. I hooked up the AOL stream of the whole album and CAN'T STOP PLAYING IT. He [Steve] is spot on--if you like Lauryn or Alicia, or Marvin, or even in some ways, Otis, then this man is for you.

I learned everything I know from watching "To Wong Foo..."
The view from my seat at Chaos. This would be a very bad place later when the porn started.


Drag Queen Bingo is a weekly event at Chaos, and Kristin and Annie had been a couple times but the straight boys and I were DQB virgins, and what a first time it was. The full album of photos can be seen here.

As Kristin has mentioned, we were the most popular table in the joint by virtue of 1. being front and center and 2. having 2 handsome straight boys at our table. Nothing brings out the sass in a Queen more than the opportunity to work hur mojo on a hot hetero boy. The bingo is merely a medium, through which the gurlz talk shit to one another and the audience. For instance, if you claim "Bingo!" but don't have the goods, the audience, as one, instructs you to "SIT YOUR ASS DOWN." Girls who go up to claim Bingo are often asked to "Show us your tits" and if the bingo playing gets stale the MCettes mix-up the shenanigans, alternating between bingo, trivia games, and doses of straight and gay porn on the big screen. The hostesses also take turns working the crowd individually, which leads to priceless pictures like this. They aren't real, but they are still *spectacular*.

Ben (Annie's brother) and Robin (Kristin's brother) were both brought up individually (see piccies below) to help decide on what sort of Bingo would be played. That is, each round the game alternates--sometimes you're going for Bingo in the shape of an "X" on your board, or like a "picture frame" (all around the edges). Straight boys get tapped for"equipment check", thereby determining if the next Bingo will be slanting to the left, etc. I'm sure both the fellas will be happy to have you know that their games were "Straight up and down". Whatever that means.

Later, during a trivia round, after declaring that he would "ROCK at that game", Robin got called up again to pit his half-Asian wits against the multitudes. And kids? He sucked at it. Here is his score. And here is the MCette giving him a pity question just to get his numbers out of the basement. Of course I won't get into how *I* knew the answers to their hard-hitting questions such as "Who sang We Don't Need Another Hero?"

I didn't win any of the bling despite having my eye on a zippy little digital coffee maker. In fact, had I gotten bingo on some of the rounds (like the porn DVD, or the dildo) I would have kept my yapper closed. But the prizes aren't why you go to DQB. You go to shake plastic maracas and tambourines; to be hit on by a drunk lesbian; to be horrified by straight porn but unmoved by the gay kind; to be told by a Val Kilmer doppelganger (a la Ice Man) that you look like a "Stephanie" and have him slather lip gloss on you in the bathroom (where he's hiding from his boyfriend while he has a verboten cigarette) because heknowswhathe'sdoinghe'samake-upartistforChanel.

Good. Times.

Ben was first...

Many hands make light work. Do you SEE all the action in the general area of Ben's crotch??

Not about to be left out, are you Robin?

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

And it was, was

The full story and all the pictures will have to wait until tomorrow...I am wiped from too little sleep post-DQB. Just know that this was the FIRST gift in the first round of bingo, so if they start out this high quality, you know it could only get better.

That's not very nice. But it *is* spot-on.

I like Wes Anderson. If for nothing else, he will forever hold a special place in my heart for "Yeah, I was in the shit." But this resemblance is uncanny, no?!! (pic cribbed from Low Culture)

Son of bitch. Shit.

I brought in my camera and all the software so that I could download the pictures from last night's DQB (all about the instant gratification). BUT somehow I don't have something I need and so that plan is a no go. [WAVE OFF....WAVE OFF.] So it'll just have to wait until tonight but *trust me* there are many pictures of questionable doings and stories to make a minister blush. Except we totally had a minister there and she was yelling more loudly than anyone. Snaps.

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

How does one dress for Drag Queen Bingo?

I guess I'll find out tonight. Btw, when I mentioned to my family yesterday (we were all out at lunch just before I left for home) that this would be my activity tonight, the entire table went silent. remember how conservative your family is. Then your brother-in-law says, "Just some aren't going to meet the kind of man you want to spend quality time with [lowers voice somewhat] at Drag Queen Bingo." I think there was some small irony going on, on his part, BUT NOT MUCH.

Note to self: Take many many pictures and post them on the family website.

How my brain works, or 1-to-R and other rational progressions

Driving home last night I heard a commentary by Walter Cronkite on the Battle of the Bulge (SO good...god I love old-fashioned reporting like this). This made me long to continue watching Band of Brothers (got the DVD set for Christmas; y'all know how I feel about this show). Then, as I watched, one of the scenes reminded me of "Death of the Ball Turret Gunner."

Is this the trajectory of most post-holiday musings? Should I be alarmed?

WTF mate?

On a morning walk in the local park my sister and her husband came across this air gun. She was a bit horrified to find this thing not 500 yards from her house in her VERY suburban neighborhood, but, you know…she wasn’t surprised. It is not a gun (although any kid taking this to school would be in some serious shit) and a bb or a pellet from this thing could still do some damage. It shouldn’t be lost on anyone either that a lot of energy goes into making air guns that resemble the real thing—right down to model number, heft, and how you cock the slide to charge the firing mechanism. As one dealer puts it…"[b]ecause of their maintenance-free design and affordability these are excellent entry level AirSoft guns for the hobby and recreational enthusiast." So, the training-bra of guns, I guess?

Not your average pop gun

Every little bit helps.

A list of organizations (compiled by CNN) that are sending supplies and workers to the areas effected by Sunday's tsunami. You can read about the group's efforts and where the money will go before donating--it's not just a blind money form--if you're so inclined.

Monday, December 27, 2004

A blizzard! In Virginia Beach?!

As mentioned earlier, I had an (almost) white Christmas in southeastern Virginia. Details and pictures to follow, but I just stop-go-accelerate-brake-neutral-first-brake-neutral-coast-second-stop-shift-goed for the last 4+ hours, and on top of family fun, shopping, sleeping in bunk beds, staying up late watching DVDs and general happenings I. am. spent. So it'll have to wait for a bit. Don't cry!

Wee glaciers

The smart man, when cleaning off his back deck and patio, shovels all the ice and snow straight into the pool. Turn on the light and start the filter to stop the whole megillah from freezing and presto!! Cool night shot.

I would have Polar Bear clubbed it for $100. OK, $50. How 'bout $2 and some stamps?

Sunday, December 26, 2004

In the craziest turn of events EVER, it is snowing gangbusters here. We woke up to huge white goopy flakes and it hasn't stopped. We're at about 2 inches of what can best be described as a "slickery" mix, but the bottom line is: 1. fridge full of leftovers? Check! 2. nowhere pressing to go? Check! 3. enough DVDs and games to run a USO canteen? Check!

Happy happy joy joy, happy happy joy joy....

Saturday, December 25, 2004

Merry Christmas

If heartfelt good wishes were currency, y'all would be rollin' in Benjamins, from me to you.

xo The ADD



Can you hear me now?


To the one and only Egg, K-Digg, the Original Asian Conflagration...Lervies, x10, and I hope you have a wonderful day.

Thursday, December 23, 2004


Who wouldn't want to celebrate a holiday with these humble, heartfelt origins:

Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.
Cosmo Kramer: What happened to the doll?
Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born . . . a Festivus for the rest of us!
Cosmo Kramer: That must've been some doll.
Frank Costanza: She was!

I'll be addressing my grievances to you all on an individual basis.

(Ed.-I bet Jesus loves Seinfeld. He was a Jew, after all.)

It's not a good time for new fighter aircraft. Both the F-22 and the JSF-35 are gasping under the weight of design problems, cost overruns, and missed deadlines. Plus? They are both, IMO, butt-fucking-ugly.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Merry Snarkmas

I've seen this before, but a friend sent it again and the laughs were all brand new. My favorite:

If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or
Yanni on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.

The metro was a bit ghostly this morning, as I think some folks have started their vacations early and left the work-a-day hassle behind. Thank goodness because I needed the room for the enormous satchel of cookies I hauled in with me today. My baking ran amok on Sunday and I needed to inflict the calories and sugar on someone! What else are coworkers for?

Speaking of, I'm on an uppers/downers regimen at the moment. I took DayQuil (trying to stave off the prickly beginnings of a cold) and while it claims to be non-drowsy, IT LIES. My solution to this is, of course, sugar. Two Godiva chocolates and 2 chocolate/coconut cookies later, I think it's safe to say I'll make through the next few hours. Now, whether I'll be productive...that's a whole other ball game.

PS--my Express guy went 9 kindsa crazy this morning with "You have a great day, pretty baby". Uh oh.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Now, if I were really industrious I would have scored some wee action figures and done a whole "Superman's palace" or "GI Joe at Cobra's hideaway" shadowbox-esque thing. But I didn't.

Last night on the way home from work I noticed that a fountain near my office had frozen spectacularly in the frigid weather. I cursed myself for not having my camera, but made sure to take it today and snapped these this morning. I guess the owners of the building got caught by surprise and hadn't turned off the water to the fountain, because it had frozen like this but water was still surging up and over the stones as well. So cool, and so beautiful.

The interesting and aesthetically pleasing truck in the background is just extra goodness. You're welcome.

This makes me want to go to Alaska.

So I was wondering one day, as you do, "Is there such a thing as Christmas techno music?" Googling it didn't bring up much, surprisingly. But it did land on this, in particular Music of Christmas Future. I liked "Angels We Have Heard on High" well enough, but I still prefer the classics. Might have to LimeWire this one and see what I get.

UPDATE: Amazon has this, but look at those song titles!! Why do I think it'll be like a Rammstein Christmas? *shudder*

I wonder if this one will break 1,000 pages?

The newest Harry Potter book will be published in July.

Monday, December 20, 2004

Out on DVD tomorrow: Napoleon Dynamite.

"Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills. You know, like nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills...."

He is so right.


I don't know who I passed on the way to work this morning because I couldn't see more than 3 feet in front of me. My head was tucked low into my chest, my shoulders hunched up around it, in a vain effort to keep cold air from working its way into the gaps between my sweater and my scarf and my hat and my coat. There's nothing quite like the cold without the snow, is there? Meh. Well, there was snow, last night, for about an hour, but it fell just after a rain and so pretty much melted on impact. The wind kicked up in earnest immediately after, and while I love blustery, this is, um...quite something. My power went out and everything.

Right now I am loving my SmartWool socks and my silk long johns. LOVING WITH MY WHOLE SELF.

Sunday, December 19, 2004

Sweet ass sweet ride. A vintage Corvette that I ogled while driving home on I-66 today. Also, notice the skies, the grey creep signaling the approach of snow!

As is Blogger's way, posts stack from the bottom-up, robbing me of all flow if I have an interest in posting a chronology. Like this weekend, for instance. Friday's stories are at bottom, even though they happened first, and frankly I'm too weary at this point to futz with the time stamp and move things around. I'm also too lazy to write big descriptions of the time spent and antics pursued, and default to using pictures to do my talking. It's less cumbersome for us ALL this way. ;)

Suffice it to say that I had a lovely weekend. Among other things, I took a wee road trip and have to say: Getting out of D.C. from time to time feels really good. I feel like I slow down and breathe deeper. Plus due west you get into small-town life and I love being reminded of simpler pleasures. You meet colorful characters like Steve from White Post at Sweet Caroline's who tells you stories that are part truth and part fiction and you're not sure which is which but it doesn't matter, and at the end of the night he's paid the tab and taken his leave. A night of much drinking for free, kids. If that isn't the hallmark of a good weekend then I don't know what is.
Well, maybe this: I'm writing by the glow of the Christmas lights, basking in the smell of the cake that's baking and waiting for the snow. Now go look at the pictures.

Banshee has two states of being: Darting...

...and at rest.

The first time I met Banshee, she ran around the first floor of her house in a circle, barking, and skittering away from me if I looked her in the eye. She did this? For a SOLID HALF AN HOUR. She's a choosy girl, and takes a long time to warm up to people. But once you're in, it's a golden feeling to be sure. For a neurotic mutt (her owner calls her this; I learned it by watching him, alright?!) she is one of the coolest animals I have ever seen.

Asians and the people who love them. Celebrating Grace's new apartment and Suzi, Chang, and Kristin having finished school for the semester. Posted by Hello

The gang assembled at Friday's dinner party. Note the damage done to the pretty table. We meant business.

Dave and D had some wandering souls of the Crew over for dinner Friday. I hadn't seen most of these people for at least 2 months and it was great to catch up, not least because D outdid herself with delectable treats (yes, that's a FONDUE pot au centre du table--yum!).

The festive table setting at Dave and D's. Real sprigs of holly, name cards, the works!! God...being a grown-up must be so nice. Posted by Hello

Friday, December 17, 2004

Kitty Hawk, North Carolina. December 17, 1903.

Happy 101st Birthday to powered flight. If at some point, just once in your life, you weren't impressed, awed, or inspired by a craft in flight, then you are cold and dead on the inside and I don't want to know you. I SAID GOOD DAY!!

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Just sayin'

More often than not, I eat M&Ms in ROYGBIV order.


Reality Blurred has up the latest snippet on Jonathan and Victoria from The Amazing Race. Unsurprisingly JFucker defends himself, insisting he does not abuse his wife (PS asshole, you can verbally abuse someone wreaking just as much devastation as you would using your fists) and that he's a victim of editing. No, Jonathan. They didn't edit you into shoving your wife. They don't edit you into screaming at her, or other contestants. While we don't see every minute of footage filmed of you, what we do see is wholly you and actions you took almost totally without provocation.

I agree with Miss Alli that it really does lower this show to have cast someone so obnoxious. He's not colorful, he's just hateful, and I don't care for "drama" at any price. BUT I wouldn't go so far as to agree with the Chicago Tribune story that puts forward the notion that the show is condoning and/or turning a blind eye to the issue of spousal abuse by airing J&V and not "stepping in." It's a veeery fine line as to where collective responsibility to step in begins--and I can't tell you where it is so I'm not going to yell at CBS for (so far) not doing it either.

What's Christmas without Mao's Little Red Book?

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Holiday antsy

My psyche is under the mistaken impression that I'm back in grade school and has ramped me up into full-on non-concentrating holiday pre-vacation antsiness. The gobs of sugary things I'm eating don't help. I'm very easily distracted and keep thinking about how pleasant it would be if I were prone in the Big Blue Chair watching a DVD by the glow of my Christmas lights. Sigh.


A very happy 42nd birthday to my brother Charlie; named after Charlton Heston in the days of El Cid (before Alzheimer's and the NRA, when dude was still cool) he's at the heart of the one time anyone waved a gun at me, and one of the most authentic people I've ever met. As he likes to say, "love and rockets," to my big brother.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

This is my friend's daughter, REFUSING to have a jolly Christmas picture taken. Word has it that she flung that candy cane to the ground and wouldn't hold still for another single shot. I love the cranky..and HOW CUTE is she?! I just feel like this sums up the general holiday feel for me: cute, festive...and juuust a little bent.


Oh my gah... the treats abound at work, and I wasn't even HERE for the Christmas party yesterday, so God knows what I'd be like if I'd been around for that smorgasbord (*silently thanks Spiderman Jesus for small blessings*). A fellow library just sent over a huge tin of chocolates--hazelnut, peanut butter, double fudge, Buckeyes, Irish mint, you name it--and I felt compelled to quality control several flavors. ohdearohdearohdearohdear

But in the last two days I finished all my Christmas shopping, got some lovely gifts from my bosses, and now feel thoroughly surrounded and engulfed (in the best sense) by the holiday spirit. I have Steve's 2003 Hot Toddy mix on "repeat" (my officemate is so pleased), am wearing a red sweater that both sparkles AND shimmers, and as if that weren't enough to make an Irishwoman happy,

KRISTIN IS HOME. !!!!!! Oh, happy day. The Asian Conflagration rolled into the 'Falls yesterday, and tonight we reconvene 1. Girls' Night and 2. ensemble watching of TAR.

I am one jazzed white woman.

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Angels and ministers of grace.... Posted by Hello

Saturday, December 11, 2004

I've said it before but it bears repeating: GloBowling at Ft. Myer is THE SHIT. Following it with vittles at Metro 29 diner? Is bliss.

(ed. Why does bowling make me so sore? I'm not an inactive person, but my quads are *killing me* right now. WTF, mate?)


Let's all welcome the newest member of the narcissistic circle, aka bloggers: Adam and his thought-provoking offering "What the Hell is Wrong with People?" (see "Link THAT")

He got fed up with being resident mASScot here at the 'Sport and got hisself a big boy blog all hissown. Greetings, Big Five Year Old!!!

Deux questions au hasard...

1. Anyone familiar with/ever made apple wine?

2. Portishead-- yay or nay?

(bear with me here...I'm at work and it's been a long day)

So close!!

Man...playing in the championship would have been so. SWEET. Alas, no. (Sorry to use the JMU link, but it was all I could find at press time. I dispute their version of events though. People from Harrisonburg CANNOT BE TRUSTED.)


Holy mistletoe, Batman. I need to buy some cheap things and wrap them in brown paper with a quickness.

Friday, December 10, 2004

Doss Middle School, Chechnya

This school is named after my dad. As part of the William R. Nelson Institute at JMU he played a big role in improving conditions in small, neglected villages throughout the region. Today would have been his 68th birthday.

BlogSport is taking the day off. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Thursday, December 09, 2004

Gareth Keenan's homepage.

Some gems from therein:

My Ideal Woman--If I could build my perfect woman (like in the film Weird Science) it would have:

Legs : Cameron Diaz
Arse : Kylie Minogue
Stomach : Britney Spears
Breasts : Jordan
Face : Jennifer Lopez
Brain : Winston Churchill

Steve slightly beat me to it, but does the source really matter? All that needs be done is a celebration in honor of the return of Alias January 5th and 24 on January 9th. They're both on new nights (Wednesdays and Mondays, respectively) and both have been on, again as Steve pointed out, much-needed breaks. I haven't been happy to do without them all fall, but some serious rethinking and retooling needed to be done and I would imagine that they've both only benefitted from the time for cast and crew to GET THEY SHIT TOGETHER. I'm desperately curious to see how Garner and Vartan deal with each other now that they are not coupled off-camera. And as we all know, no Spawn is good Spawn. But these things all remain to be 4 weeks. WOOT!! (That's like "WAX", Shelby)


to Kristin who just took her last exam, successfully completing her first quarter of graduate school. Three cheers for the Egg!

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

"That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older....they staaay the saaaame aaage."

Did you know that there was a real Wooderson? And Floyd? And Slater? There are, and they're suing the writer/director of Dazed and Confused for using their names and loose facts of their high school years in Texas. I can see it's being *annoying* but, emotional distress?? C'mon. Just be cool, man.

Blade: Trinity opens today. WAX. If that isn't a holiday movie, I don't know what is.

And FYI, Jon Stewart is on Larry King: Live tonight. I'm not a big LK fan, but it's Jon!!! Anything for Jon!

Tuesday, December 07, 2004

AWESOME. Great Falls, VA. December 5, 2004. Posted by Hello

Hard to believe that a few miles further south it's calm enough to scull. Every view of this river on this trail is breathtaking. It's such a gem, right in our backyard. Posted by Hello

Can't you just picture the cozy blazes and pots of soup simmering? Or it's a bit Sleepy Hollow. Up to you. Posted by Hello

I kept spying kayakers as I made my way along the river, but they were always moving so quickly they'd be done doing whatever cool trick they were up to by the time I unearthed my camera. Here they were taking turns paddling up and riding that eddy (the white bit at the base of the rock) but I felt like a stalker waiting to capture it so I just took this and went on about my bidness. Posted by Hello

As I hiked along the River Trail, I came upon some lengths of rope tied around boulders and trees. At first I thought it was blocking off part of the trail, but then I realized all the ends of rope led off the edge of the rocks I was gamboling over. A little later on the trail, when I paused to look back upriver, I saw why.... Climbers, go on with your bad selves! Posted by Hello

OK, last week, when Santa and the M&MS first made their debut, I did alright. Despite being lousy with sugar and chocolate goodness (and, as John pointed out, laden a la Giles Corey in the The Crucible: "More weight!"...yay, smart, well-read friends!), I said NO to the M&Ms. Srrssly. But now they are peanut butter M&Ms, and I am in serious trouble. Oy.

Speaking of, Happy Hanukkah, starting tonight!

New favorite soother music

I know, you'd think I was on Yahoo! radio's payroll as much as I mention them here, but I listen to My Radio constantly at work, rating songs and artists and occasionally they totally hook me up by suggesting something new based on other choices I've made. While that didn't work well in the case of Alabama Thunderpussy (still roll my eyes at the name), they were bang on this morning when they played Mutual Admiration Society's self-titled debut. This band is made up of the 3 members of Nickel Creek (heart!) and Glen Phillips, former lead singer of Toad the Wet Sprocket. The melding of the 2 is what you would expect, but that's the sort of thing I love...harmonies and strings and acoustics and a little folk/country vibe. Wish list, here they come.

"Is it still raining? I hadn't noticed...."

This story immediately made me think of Des and Bry, who often quote this line as a sign of Andie's acting prowess, and to illustrate how much they respect her and admire her work.

As for "Nobody puts Baby in a corner", that is NOT cheesy. That is poetry. Sheer poetry.

Monday, December 06, 2004

Happy Ears, courtesy of XO London:

Van Lear Rose

Kenny & Dolly: Once Upon a Christmas

Happy Eyes, courtesy of Pam:

I spent the better part of Saturday and Sunday evenings watching "Lost." Pam had taped the first 5 or so episodes for me, swearing that I would love them, and I had DVRd the rest. I didn't want to watch them out of order, and hadn't had time to see them until now, so sat down and *glutted* myself for about 8 hours straight. This show is done by J.J. Abrams (of Alias fame), so you know he knows how to charm me. They're already knee-deep into the suspension-of-reality storylines, and I don't mind one bit. The flashbacks are a brilliant touch, and it doesn't hurt that part of the story takes place in Australia so that 1. we get lots of scenes Down Under and 2. Aussies are in the cast. I am reeled in hook, line, and sinker.

Unhappy boca grande, courtesy of Dr. Mills:

The novocaine is wearing off and I can feel every millimeter of my jaw. FUCKING OW.

I suppose at some point today I'll blog about how I got totally addicted to "Lost" this weekend, or that I went hiking in Great Falls (of *course* I took pictures), or that I had a filling done this morning and the left half of my face NO WORK, but for the moment I will just tell you that in looking up a book title at work just now I came across another work by a Richard Hiscocks. You aren't misreading that. "Dick" Hiscocks.


Saturday, December 04, 2004

Jesus. is. PISSED.

Friday night I went to a charity concert at Catholic University, at the Shrine of the Holy Basilica of the Immaculate Kitchen of Our Lady of Permanent Carpal Tunnel E Pluribus Unum. My dear friend Susie (who sings like an angel!) was performing with one of the many professional groups that are lucky to have her talents. Her group, plus two from Catholic U., performed various Christmas songs--all of the classical or carol variety; no Feliz Navidad, sadly--to raise money for So Others Might Eat and to begin officially the holiday season for the church, the school, and most of the audience. I know up until last night I hadn't felt like it was Christmas yet, despite having my decorations up at home. I'm not sure what it is; it's not a bah humbug thing. I just don't feel assaulted and surrounded by Christmas like I usually do by this time of year. But whatever.

The concert was great, IMO. Susie swears that someone in her group effed up with both hands, but having no idea what to listen for, I couldn't tell the difference and just enjoyed the sounds and, um, sights. The first sight being the poor woman in front of me who, soon after she sat down, announced to her friend that she was REALLY SICK BUT IT SHOULD BE A GREAT SHOW (cough). Well, Snotty McBoogerton was seized with a fit of hacking coughing about an hour into the performance. It went on so long that people in front of AND behind her offered her gum, lozenges, and candy to help out. But girlfriend didn't need their trifling palliatives. Oh no. She reached into her backpack, broke out a bottle of Robitussin DM and took a hearty swig like you or I would from a flask. Ah...all better. I kid you not--I put my head down (looking very prayerful, I'm sure)--and shook with silent giggles. Fucking hilarious.

The other sight was Our Lord and Savior pictured up there in all his "I WILL FUCK YOUR SINNING SHIT UP, AMEN" glory. I kept staring at him all through the evening because 1. brother is *ripped*. I can think of linebackers that would kill for those pecs and 2. does he not look turbo disgruntled? He's got his pimp hand up ready to bitch slap all those who persecute his people. I don't see this guy benevolently multiplying the loaves and fish, or jovially turning water into wine. But I can see him going absolutely BLOTTO against the salesmen in the temple. This god IS a terrifying and awesome god. No hippie Jesus avec sandals here. HELL NO.

I'm sure if you got close enough you could hear him channeling the sentiment of the evening, saying "Merry Christmas you buncha BUSTAHS!"

Spiderman Jesus

The Basilica is gorgeous, but fairly modern by church, and church artwork, standards. The paintings are all very bright, colorful, and not a little super hero-esque. In one side nave, on the ceiling, this spry young-looking version of Jesus looked on ready to kick some criminal ASS if need be.

Head of Newt

All good spells call for Newt. I couldn't get any eye, so some back-of-the-head will have to do. Newt Gingrich's wife is in the same singing group as my friend who performed on Friday, and I sat 5 rows behind him. He's the one with the white hair and the devil on his shoulder.

The Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, Northeast D.C. Posted by Hello

Trapped Santa or, The Trouble with Tribble (M&Ms)

This is a candy dish my mom gave me, currently in my office and brimming with peanut M&Ms. In looking at it yesterday I got the impression that Santa was trapped under the weight of the candy, and what's more, resigned to his fate.

Alright, getting back into the swing of blogging, I promise, this afternoon after groceries and a run. In the meantime check out this cool picture (Cleveland Plain Dealer via CNN). I wish I could put the photo straight up, but the link will have to do. Makes me wish 1. I were at the beach and that 2. I had a workshop full of tools.

Friday, December 03, 2004

Yahoo! radio just played one of my all-time favorite songs, "Fancy" by Reba McEntire. This song is so bad, it's good. I can't get enough. A sample of the lyrics that secured its place in my heart:

Mama what do I do?
She said just be nice to the gentlemen, Fancy
They'll be nice to you
Here's your one chance, Fancy, don't let me down...

...I couldn't see spending the rest of my life
With my head hung down in shame you know
I might have been born just plain white trash
But Fancy was my name

Sometimes I feel like a fireman. You know how they often describe their jobs as hours of waiting, and boredom, punctuated by 5 minutes of GO GO GO!!!!!! every once in a while? So often I perk along here at a steady, ambling pace, but occasionally (like this morning) 3 people come to me with 15 things that need to be done *yesterday* and I'm all "Wha happened?"

Thank the holy and sweet potato Lord that it's Friday.

Thursday, December 02, 2004

You can tell it's the time of year for exams when all the student bloggers in your life drop off the face of the earth. Kristin, Suzi, and James have all been woefully absent from postings and playtime in general, and while I understand completely and wish them a speedy and easy time through the last days of their semesters (or quarter, as the case might be), I can't help feeling that they're putting their needs ahead of mine. *shakes head*

Wednesday, December 01, 2004

My goal was to have my cheeks match my shirt by night's end, and can I say: MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!

Alright, you’ve waited long enough, here she goes: The story of The Reunion.

I drove down to the ‘burg on Friday afternoon (where I stayed with Corinna’s family in their gorgeous lakeside home). Mr. Fisher (who works for the largest construction company in town) took us on a tour of the new high school under construction and can I say? We wuz robbed!!! The new facility is huge, mo-derne, and so sweet ass sweet. I loved my school, but Damn, Gina.

Anyway, C & I got gussied up and had some old friends in for a preparty (pictured above). Mr. Fisher made these delectable concoctions called Dark n’ Stormys (main ingredient: rum) but I stuck to champagne and apparently handled a whole bottle myself before we even got to the party. I was a little nervous, I’ll admit, and so I lubed up freely.

The reunion (full album can be viewed here) took place at a nice pub downtown. My fears for the night, while minimal, also proved totally groundless, as I had, no foolin’, one of the best nights of my adult life. To set context it’s important to underscore that, while I had friends and acquaintances in high school, I was no social butterfly. I spent most nights in (and most of those studying), so to show up and drink and be a grown up and feel so comfortable in my skin around these people who have seen me at my most awkward was so affirming. I know that’s just too precious and Hollywood B-movie-esque, but it was my night and there’s nothing like the truth to spice up the ‘Sport.

Everyone was kind and interested and gregarious. I caught up with so many effing cool people; saw pictures of people’s kids (!) and met peoples' spouses; reminisced about the wicked stupid shit we pulled back in the day; chatted with people I’d known since 3rd grade. And 6th grade; and got really drunk. I didn’t pay for a single drink all night (thanks Kevin and Ryan and Kari). This is desperately obvious in the hue and shine achieved by my cheeks by ½ way through the night. I remember 94% (wink) of my conversations and don’t think I did anything too embarrassing, but even if I did, it was so worth it.

So many of the axioms bore out, too: the boys all looked great, and, really, they are MEN now (crazy). The ugly ducklings had swanned nicely, and the cliques disappeared as everyone steeped themselves in some seriously unabashed good cheer. Everyone gave me shit about being voted “Most Likely to Succeed”, asked very kindly about my family, and I was a bit staggered to find out how many folks are up here in the general DC area. How can wander around this wee city and not run into them, I’d like to know!

We closed the bar, went to another bar, and then went to the home of a girl who still lives in town. Corinna and I ended by calling a (ridiculously cheap) cab at 4 am and heading back for too little drunken sleep. Hair of the dog was my best friend the next day as I caught the Tech v. UVa game (complete w/ many Guinness) and then more beers and shots that night. I drank more this weekend than I have in about 6 months, did not sleep nearly enough, and wouldn’t have changed a single minute.

Go Blue Streaks!

My brother-in-law, sister, and I were talking about this during my trip 2 weekends ago. We are all HUGE Depeche Mode fans and these mixes look to be fecking off-the-hook good. You bet your sweet badunkadunk it's already on the Wishlist.

I just was downstairs in the main hall of the school, and our annual Christmas tree has just been delivered and awaits decorations. But it is so freshly cut that the whole 1st floor smells of fresh pine. It. is. heavenly.

Wow. It's only THREE YEARS late.

Bush is in Canada today to say "Merci" to the people of the 51st state for all their help in the days after 9/11/01 when so many flights were diverted away from US airspace. I wholeheartedly applaud the sentiment, but if this is his turn-around time, no wonder so much stuff if FUCKED UP around here.