Saturday, March 04, 2006

Real-time TAR blogging...3 days late

I stand by what I said. Those Staten Island boob floats are painful oxygen-wasting plastic orange idiot wenches. Don't be pissed when you're treated like turbo pink bimbos, because that's what you're putting out there. You made that skanky bed; lie in it.

I love the Manhattan, KS couple. They're geeks in love.

Lake and Michelle? Reinforcing every bad Southern stereotype. "That black girl is gonna beat you!"??? I hope she does...BEAT YOUR ASS YOU CRACKER.

I'm guessing Kristin loves the flamboyant San Fran guys. Why? 'Cause they're skinny. The brown-haired one reminds me of a young Steven Speilberg.

Looking at all those backpacks makes worry about how heavy mine will be in Montana. And how dirty I will be. Not the fun porn dirty; greasy yak dirty.

I love how the gay guys *whisper* so that the cab driver, who doesn't speak English, won't hear that they're talking about him.

HELICOPTER!!!!!!!!!!!! I think you know which I would choose for the detour.

In my head it's Eric and Germy.

Wow...I would make fun of the old couple but as we all know I'm mole rat-blind.

Did Joseph just call Lake Scott Peterson? Wrong, but hilarious.

Does anyone else think it's Atrium Five and *not* Atrium Vee?

Wanda and Desiree are the Latina Gilmore Girls.

OK, Brazil = Portugese. Thank you = obrigado, not gracias. Just sayin'. Also, no "amigo" "por favor" or "rapido."

"Grab a big load of terds." A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

At first those "Life takes" Visa ads tickled me, but now pretty much I just think Life takes a big dose of SHUT THE HELL UP.

I bet Des is big-time grooving on the soccer stuff. But it'd be even cooler if the guy at the pit stop was Pele.

Wand-er. That's "Wanda" in Phil-ese.

The look on Phil's face says "Lake, I know Jonathan, I've met Jonathan, and you're an ass, but you're no Jonathan."

That's too bad about the guys eliminated. But since I don't even know their names, it's probably for the best.


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